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Now we've acknowledged the reasons why people may struggle at Christmas, it's important to be aware of how we can cope and what we can do to support ourselves and others. Not everything will work for everyone and it may take some time to try out different things to find the ones which are most beneficial to you.
Money
Access financial support (https://www.trusselltrust.org/get-help/help-through-hardship-helpline/)
Planning or budgeting - writing a list of what you need to buy and putting money aside for certain things can make everything a bit more manageable.
Use second-hand websites such as eBay or Vinted to buy gifts
Look for local events which may offer free entries or support with food and gifts
Don't be afraid to talk to people - discussing your issues with friends and families can lessen the feelings, and you may be able to come up with a plan to keep things low-cost
Loneliness
There are several things you can do that may help when you are feeling alone
Volunteering work/ giving back to the community can give you a sense of purpose and a chance to meet new people
Calling a friend/ family member
Plan your days - filling your days with activities can act as a good distraction, lift your mood, and keep you busy
Co-parenting
Despite splitting your time with your children being extremely difficult, there are ways in which you can try and lessen the impact on your mental health.
Try and communicate honestly and openly as much as possible
Keep yourself busy if you won't have your children/child over the holidays - see friends, other family members
Make plans with your co-parent in advance to give you time and avoid any last-minute plans and stress
Always ensure your children come first
Missing loved ones
Consider old and new traditions which can help you feel closer to those you have lost
Don't feel pressured to celebrate, if you just don't want to
Be open and honest with friends and family about how you're feeling and what you're struggling with, so they can know how to best support you
Practicality
Plan/book ahead as much as possible to avoid any stress or miscommunications (making bookings in advance can sometimes reduce costs too)Don't overwhelm yourself with plans that can become difficult to manage
Lean on friends and family for support when it comes to arranging childcare if you need to work
Speak to your employer about flexible working arrangements
Strained/ difficult relationships
Set boundaries - make it clear which topics you don't want to talk about
Distance yourself where possible from people that you have difficult relationships with
Don't be afraid to limit the time you spend with people
Feel confident to say no to plans with people you don't get on with
Make plans for yourself - as always, keep yourself busy
Plan responses to certain discussions you think might be brought up
Being unwell or in hospital
Staying in touch with family and friends via video or phone calls
Planning time for friends and family to visit and celebrate
Plan to celebrate Christmas at a later date when you're better / not in hospital
Feelings once Christmas is over
There are things we can do, to make the transition from Christmas back to reality that little bit easier
Make new year plans that you can look forward to
Don't put too much pressure on yourself to make new years resolutions
Practice self-care
Organisation and planning ahead
Thinking about what you may find challenging over Christmas and what you could do to help yourself, is really useful.
For many, having a routine is very important and keeps them calm. If possible, try and implement as much of your routine as possible during the festive period.
Don't overwhelm yourself with too many plans. Don't say yes to everything if you feel it might be too much to manage, don't be afraid to say no!
If you struggle with your mental health, such as anxiety, ensure you know what helps you during difficult moments, so you can practice them when you're celebrating
Make a list of any support services you might need and when they are open/closed.
Self-care
Remember that looking after yourself during this time is the most important thing.
Do things that bring you joy - watching your favourite film, making your favourite dinner, seeing friends, going for a long walk, etc
Remind yourself that this time will pass
Set your boundaries - be comfortable saying no to things that you don't want to do
Validate your feelings - just because how you feel, might not be how other people feel during Christmas, it doesn't mean that your experiences are any less valid than anyone else's. Everyone has the right to feel the way they do
Adding structure to your days - getting outside, even for a brief time can make you feel better.
Social media and society pressures
Seeing what other people are doing on social media, can make us feel pressured to go out and do things, or make us feel isolated, or that we're not making the most of the time.
Avoid comparing yourself to others - people only show you what they want you to see
Reduce social media/ news viewings
Eating
The most important thing to do if you struggle with food is to be as open and honest with those you are spending the time with.
If the thought of lots of food is overwhelming to you, you could ask if the food can be put out in a different room to where you will be eating, so you can't constantly see it. (e.g. ask for the food to be put out in the kitchen if you're all eating in the living room)
Planning ahead of time - knowing what food will be available, so you know what to expect can help reduce the anxieties of the unknown
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